I recently received some new clothes from someone as a very thoughtful gift. However, they came from the youth section and the sizes tend to run a bit smaller there than they do in the women’s section. I could tell they were going to be a bit small but decided to try them on anyway. I was quickly reminded of how awful it feels to try and squeeze into clothes that are too small!
I can be feeling great in my body with no complaints in the world and then I try to squeeze into these clothes and suddenly I am feeling very uncomfortable in my skin. Then I decided to keep them on for a bit (I have no idea why I thought that was a good plan). We all know the feeling, to sit down was uncomfortable, to bend over was painful, trying to nurse my son was frustrating. In about 10 minutes I felt too big, too long, too fat, and totally uncomfortable.
Why do we do this to ourselves?! No one feels good in clothes that are too small no matter their body size, shape, weight or body fat percentage. We all deserve clothes that fit well. And we deserve to dress in a way that makes us feel good.
Here is a quick guide to building a wardrobe that fits properly, feels good and is fashionable!
1-get rid of clothes that no longer fit.
I understand if you don’t want to be wasteful. I made the mistake of giving my entire closet to the goodwill while I was pregnant and then ended up really disappointed that I no longer had all those great clothes when my body came back to my prepregnancy size. However, having “goal clothes” taunting you in your closest is toxic. You all know I don’t support dieting and exercising to change our bodies. However, your body size and shape may change with events like pregnancy or with learning to eat intuitively etc. If you want to hold onto clothes store them somewhere out of mind, maybe even at a good friend or family members place. It can be frustrating and even overwhelming to look at a closet full of clothes that are the wrong size for you. Make sure the clothes you see every day in your closet and drawers are all clothes that fit you comfortably.
2-Pick up the basics in comfortable sizes
I don’t claim to know anything about fashion. So, I enlisted my good friend and client Ashley Kilby to let us know what the basics are and how to make the most of them. Ashley is a personal stylist who focuses on helping women create customized looks and to maximize and organize their wardrobes. She suggested starting with classic styles in solid neutral colors. I’ve got his part down! After I had Jack my body was at a new size. It was just different enough that my maternity clothes were too big and my pre-pregnancy clothes were too small. I was either pulling my maternity pants up all day long and dealing with a saggy crotch situation or I was uncomfortable and pulling at clothes that were too tight. I knew I would feel much better if I went out and got some clothes that fit properly. I headed down to Target and got myself a couple pairs of jeans that fit well and a few different shirts in different styles and solid colors. This didn’t cost much money and it was exactly what I needed to go from feeling frumpy and awkward to feeling comfortable and confident in my body, no exaggeration.
You can absolutely stop here and you have honored your body by dressing it comfortably and you should be feeling much more at home in your skin. However, I know sometimes we like to get dressed up a bit. Taking some time to do my hair and make-up, put on a nice outfit and accessorize a bit for a date night with my husband is a form of self-care for me. I know many of us enjoy getting “fashionable” from time to time. If you have a little money in the budget and want to get a bit more style going on Ashley recommends the following tips
3-Add “fashion”
Accent your basics with trending colors, prints, and textures. Some fashion examples would be; a cardigan, fun scarf, a cute clutch or trendy vest!
4-Complete the look
The style is in the details! Accessorize! The right accessories are a game changer for your closet. Throw on a quick pair of statement earrings or necklace! Have fun mixing bracelets and metal types! Express yourself!
Our bodies deserve to be dressed comfortably and in clothes that we enjoy. This is an act of self-care. Self-care can look differently for everyone. Sometimes for me, self-care is going to target to buy clothes that fit, sometimes it’s getting myself dolled up and enjoying a date night with the husband and so many other things. We all want to feel good in our skin and this is just one avenue to do that. Remember that our worth and value do not come from our body shape or size, what clothes or make-up you have on or what accessories you are wearing. That being said it sure feels good to pamper yourself a little bit and get a bit fashionable sometimes.
If you’re interested in learning more about fashion Check out Ashley. She is always going live with make-up, jewelry, and fashion tips. I chose to share Ashley’s information with you because she approaches all of this simply with the desire to have fun and celebrate your body and your beauty. Ashley is working with me on her own journey towards body positivity, intuitive eating, and joyful body movement. She has actually helped me realize that getting dolled up can be a form of self-care and can come from a place of love and respect for myself. I have often felt a bit guilty if I wanted to get dolled up; like I was giving in to the lie that I need this stuff to be worthy. But, it really depends on how you’re approaching it.
Is getting dolled up a form of self-care for you? Or is it something you feel you have to do to be accepted?
